Friday, September 20, 2013

Family Values from Hindu Trinity

The holy trinity of Hinduism - God the Creator (Brahma), God the Sustainer (Vishnu), and God the Destroyer (Shiva). This trinity is an all-male Supreme Force that creates, sustains, and destroys everything in the universe. Male chauvinistic? Think again! 

Here's how this Trinity functions. 

All three married up - their wives are more well-to-do than they are!
  • Brahma - Married Saraswati, the Goddess of Knowledge and Wisdom 
  • Vishnu - Married Lakshmi, the Goddess of Wealth (eight different forms of wealth) and Prosperity
  • Shiva - Married Parvati, the manifestation of Aadi Shakti, the Supreme Power, and feeder of the Universe (Annapurna)

The reason for these marriages is said to be as follows.
  • Creation is pretty meaningless without knowledge and wisdom. Brahma's creation is given meaning by Saraswati
  • Sustenance is impossible without wealth. Lakshmi enables Vishnu to sustain the universe
  • Destroying is impossible without power and energy. Parvati provides Shiva the power (as Shakti) and energy (as Annapurna)

Bottom-line? The “all-male” Trinity cannot function without its female counterparts balancing their act.

And here is how they act as a couple.
  • Brahma is completely oblivious to everything around him, including his wife Saraswati. Saraswati is always right next to her husband, making sure she provides necessary knowledge and wisdom to her husband's creation (lest her oblivious-to-his-surroundings husband goofing up). 
  • Vishnu lives a lavish king-size life on his wife's wealth, and uses it to do his job as the sustainer. His wife Lakshmi, lives in his heart (keeping it strong), and sits at his feet massaging his tired feet, knowing fully well that he is nothing without her. At times, when she gets upset with him, she walks away leaving him in total disarray (resulting in things like - Srinivasa incarnation, Padmavati Kalyanam, and subsequent Venkataswara incarnation).
  • Shiva is the humble, innocent, and naive of the pack. He wraps a deer skin around his waist, roams around like a homeless guy in the streets and in graveyards, goes to his wife's (Annapurna) house to beg for food and energy, and then goes away again doing his job, living a very humble life. Sometimes, he goes away for years into meditation. Parvati, the most loyal of all, never leaves him, always waits for his return, and when he doesn't, she goes and brings him back. When her naïve husband gets into trouble because of his naivety, she becomes Kaali to protect her husband. Shiva, who loves his wife completely, gives half of his body (the left half where the heart resides) to her, and is always ready to destroy the entire universe in one stroke - if something untoward was to happen to her. 

Bottom-line... Contrary to "popular" image and belief, Hinduism is not patriarchal... but more of egalitarian, and a balancing-act kind of way of life – if you truly understand the Hindu Way of Life and Dharma. 

There is a lot one can learn from Hinduism about family values and husband-wife relationships, if one can read, understand, think, and learn. Wish we learn our lessons sooner than later.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

What is Sati? How did it come into existence?


Taking off from a comment on one of the posts (Why do hindus break Coconut in the Temple), wanted to share some information about Sati Practice. Sati is one of the most controversial (and often misinformed) Hindu practices in India. What is often not talked about is that this practice has been around in various cultures, religions, and regions across the world for at least over 2200 years (various names, of course).

Story of the 'Sati' Origin:

The term 'Sati' originated from (and refers to) Parvati, the consort of Shiva. One of Parvati's incarnations is Daakshaayani (Sanskrit: दाक्षायणि; Transliteration: dākṣāyaṇi), the daughter of the King Daksha Prajapati. Daakshaayani falls in love with Shiva and wishes to marry him. However, Daksha Prajapati does not approve of his (a king's) daughter (a princess) marrying a (for lack of better English term) homeless guy, who has three eyes instead of the normal two, wears nothing but a tiger skin around his waist, covers himself with ashes from cremations, and roams around in graveyards with snakes around his neck and a trident in his hands (A.K.A Shiva). However, disregarding her father's objections, Daakshaayani marries Shiva and takes the name of Sati after marriage.

Daksha once performs a great yaaga and invites all the kings of earth and everyone from the heavens, except Shiva and Sati (I bet, "I can't introduce a homeless guy as my son-in-law to all the great personalities and dignitaries invited to this event. The couple is an insult to me and my greatness!" kind of rich man's ego mentality had something to do with it). However, Sati wishes to go to the event (after all, it's being hosted by her father who loves her the most) and asks Shiva to go with her. Shiva, in his infinite wisdom, refuses to go, and asks Sati not to go either, stating that - "Even if it is your parents' house, where your husband is constantly insulted and looked down upon, people won't respect you either. People will look down upon you. Even if they don’t look down upon you, you will not be able to tolerate the insults and humiliation they would subject your husband to".

Sati, trusting her father's love for her, disregards Shiva's advice and goes to the Daksha Yaagna. There, she sees Shiva's statue at the gates (as a doorman), and hears her father insulting and humiliating Shiva (her husband) in the presence of all the invitees. Unable to tolerate her husband’s public humiliation by her father, Sati is overrun with tremendous grief, jumps into the holy fire of the yaaga, and immolates herself. Another legend says that she rubbed her left toe on the ground, generated fire, and immolated herself. Thus the self-immolation of a grief-stricken wife in the holy fire is called Sati.

To continue with the story, his wife's immolation outrages Shiva, transforming him into Maha Rudra (the furious form of Shiva), and performing Rudra Tandavam (the dance of fury). During the dance, he plucks a lock of his hair (jaTha), smashes it on the dance floor, creating the ferocious Veera Bhadra - the powerful dark lord. Maha Rudra orders Veera Bhadra to destroy Daksha Yagna, then walks into the fire where his beloved wife's body lies burning, picks her up, and walks away into isolation. Another legend says that as he is carrying her body, various parts of her body fell in various places of the Indian sub-continent, each giving birth to a Shakti PeeTham.

Origin of the Practice:

There is no clear timeframe as to when it originated. The earliest recorded history dates back to the times of Alexander, the Great (320 BC or something). However, the custom was in practice for much longer before Alexander’s times. Originally, it came into existence exactly for the reason why Sati immolated herself (in the above story) – Overrun by unbearable grief. It was not just practiced by women (or wives), but also by men (or husbands). According to Hindu custom, men and married women are cremated. Self-immolation during spousal cremation was practiced by surviving spouse stricken by unbearable grief from the loss of her/his beloved life- and spiritual- companion, combined by the thought of living for many years without her/his companionship. The surviving spouse would “choose” the holy fire of the cremation (and the resultant pain from burning alive) to be less painful than a life without the dead spouse. It was NEVER meant to be a “wife-only” or a “forced” custom. It was by choice of the surviving spouse.

Changing Practice with Changing Male Dominance:

As the times changed, with numerous wars dwindling male population, and higher female-to-male ratio, a couple of things started happening. These are various research aspects that are currently being debated by historians and scholars. I am neither a historian nor a scholar – just sharing what I found in my research on the topic.
1.      One theory says that Sati (along with other customs, such as forced widowhood, and girl marriages) was practiced primarily to address the problem of women surplus population.
2.      Anther says that Sati was also enforced (actually in Greece) to discourage young wives from poisoning their old husbands (my personal view? Young wives poisoning old husbands is a problem created by greedy men who, in their 50s and 60s would marry 13 or 16 year old girls).

Religious rules and Laws against the Custom:

However, unless there was a strong reason and choice by the widow, Sati was never to be "enforced"; Not in Hindu custom. Cases of Sati have been documented even in Mahabharata, where Maadri (the second wife of Pandu Raja) chose to immolate herself along with her dead husband, while Kunty (the first wife) chose to live on to take care of the Pandavas. In Ramayana, all three wives of the king Dasaratha lived on (no self-immolation) after his death, while Sita was asked to immolate herself by her own husband to prove her chastity. There has never been a rule or a law in Hindu religion towards Sati. There are ample rules against it.

Padma Purana forbids Sati for Brahmin wives, while it is considered noble for a Kshatriya wife. Well… killing a Brahmin (man or a woman) is considered as grave a sin as killing Brahma (Brahma Hatya Maha Patakam). For Kshatriya women, it was considered noble because their husbands typically died on the battlefield, and self-immolation was considered a better choice for them than the possible alternative (of being captured and enslaved by the enemy warriors).
 
In 3rd and 4th centuries AD, it was mostly prevalent in the Northern India (modern day Punjab, Rajasthan, Madhya Pradesh, and Bengal). During the times of Delhi Sultanate (12th and 13th Centuries AD), a widow had to seek permission from the government to be self-immolated (thereby ensuring a woman's choice). However, this was easily turned into forced "choice" by the family members. A number of Mughal Emperors issues orders (many times over) forbidding Sati. In 1800s, British enacted laws against Sati. This continued into the independent India, and the Indian Penal Code. Today, Sati is all but eradicated.

Does that mean there is no sati instance whatsoever in India? Of course not. There have been one or two reported incidents even in 2013. Every instance of Sati results in public outcry. And every instance of Sati is a result of some uneducated, backward village people forcing a young widow to immolate herself because they consider her “inauspicious”. Regardless, in this day-and-age where women leave (and divorce) their men (or husbands) for any and every reason, there is no reason for a woman to choose to immolate herself after the death of her husband. They are grief-stricken, but not so consumed with their grief (at least not in this day-and-age) to take their own lives by jumping into fire. They may consider other, less painful methods, but not Sati. Today, a case of Sati is not really a case of Sati per se. It is a case of murder in the guise of Sati.